Source: Martha Louise/Istagram




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Being @shamandurek ‘s girlfriend has given me a crash course in how white supremacy is at play and the way I have consciously and subconsciously thought of and acted towards black people. How I have taken my rights for granted – never looked properly at what racism really is, because it has been comfortable for me that the system is in place. I am not proud of it, but I realize I need to grow into understanding this deeply rooted system to be able to be part of the dismantling of it. I, as a white person, need to grow, educate myself and become better and move from being against racism to being anti-racist. Racism is not just the obvious (which I thought it was), of the openly discrimination, mistreating and killing of black people which is easy and obvious to take a stand against. It is in the details (which I had no idea still existed). It is in the way people shy away from Durek. How friends assume he lies about everything. That he is evil for being kind. The words muttered under their breath, making it perfectly clear to him that he does not have a natural place at the table. People at high places saying “How dare you think I would touch your hand?” when he reached out his hand to say goodnight (pre Covid-19). People thinking they aren’t racist, but don’t know anyone with a different skin color than their own, apart from the people working for them. How it is assumed that Durek is not a good person who actually loves me, but has manipulated me into loving him and keeps manipulating me in our relationship. How he will exploit me financially. The press presents him as a liar, being violent and a threat to my family and myself, sharing scrupulously his X’s story without checking facts, because it supports the belief system already in place about him. THAT IS RACISM! We have both received death threats for being together and have weekly been told that we shame our people and families for choosing each other. The reality of it all is that I love how he holds space for me as a woman, listens to my wisdom and shows up for me and my girls. I love how he shares his wisdom with the world, how he inspires, creates change CONTINUES BELOW IN COMMENTS 👇

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